Currently dating in my 30s and this list is such a wonderful reminder of how to approach it all! I'm curious, are you doing anything outside of dating apps? I'm trying to do more IRL things but the groups and hobbies I sign up for are always made up of women and gay or married men. Do single men not go out and do things anymore??
Thank you! Oh boy, dating is such a weird and wild thing. I think the apps are good, just to get yourself out there talking and meeting new people but it's certainly not the best.
Not sure where you live, but go out to places where guys hang out during the day, for example, in NYC, I would say go to a sports games, the Rangers or the Knicks, head to a dog park (borrow a friend's dog even) and chat up the cutie dog owners (without wedding rings), head to a Barry's Bootcamp for a workout, even Sweetgreen, or a coffee shop (somewhere unassuming) and talk to the intriguing guy that's adding milk to his coffee. The best that can happen is that you exchange numbers and the worst is that you never hear from him, which is the same as having not spoken to him at all, so in my opinion, worth a shot. Also, having friends set you up is a great way to partially vet someone (I realize this one is obvious). Lastly, a girlfriend of mine read in some book and swears that if you stare at a guy (again, without a wedding ring) for 3-5 min without looking away, they will come up to you. SO take that for what it's worth :) Let me know how it goes! cx
Wise words. Number 9 is EXACTLY what I find myself saying over and over again to women in the dating world (and what I wish I could go back and tell my younger self). I have been musing on writing a post on this myself 😊
This is a big one! I think when you flip that script and are deciding how you feel vs wondering how they feel everything changes. Write the post! Everyone needs to read and re-read these things over and over :)
Thanks so much for responding. I love when you write about dating or what you wrote about living without kids. I can do relating to all of it, being in my mid 40s and juggling with ideas of a life you thought you would be living and actual life you are living. Any wisdom of perimenopause would also be useful. But truthfully it always seems that whatever you write about rings very true for me so just keep going. :))
Somehow I’ve stumbled upon your site and am receiving your emails. Not to sound rude, but I have no idea how. I don’t remember signing up. However, after reading a few emails I received and then this article, I’m hooked. You are so genuine, kind and upfront about dating beyond divorce and later in life. I’m happy to say quite a bit I know already, and still this is so validating, helpful and supportive. Thank you!
Reagan! Your message made my day / week / year. Means a lot. And always curious to know what you're interested in reading more about. Happy to be connected.
And now you made mine! I’m so thrilled you responded. Honestly, I appreciate your writings on what’s possible in a next chapter of life. I’m 42 and divorced - amicable and it’s been a few years, so that’s not a thing - but you know, it’s like ok what am I doing now? I’d still love to meet someone amazing for me, have a baby. I have an awesome career, friends and family, and I just don’t want to lose focus that there’s still so much out there and possible. So more of that inspiration, and you’re doing that with this site. So thank you!
Currently dating in my 30s and this list is such a wonderful reminder of how to approach it all! I'm curious, are you doing anything outside of dating apps? I'm trying to do more IRL things but the groups and hobbies I sign up for are always made up of women and gay or married men. Do single men not go out and do things anymore??
Thank you! Oh boy, dating is such a weird and wild thing. I think the apps are good, just to get yourself out there talking and meeting new people but it's certainly not the best.
Not sure where you live, but go out to places where guys hang out during the day, for example, in NYC, I would say go to a sports games, the Rangers or the Knicks, head to a dog park (borrow a friend's dog even) and chat up the cutie dog owners (without wedding rings), head to a Barry's Bootcamp for a workout, even Sweetgreen, or a coffee shop (somewhere unassuming) and talk to the intriguing guy that's adding milk to his coffee. The best that can happen is that you exchange numbers and the worst is that you never hear from him, which is the same as having not spoken to him at all, so in my opinion, worth a shot. Also, having friends set you up is a great way to partially vet someone (I realize this one is obvious). Lastly, a girlfriend of mine read in some book and swears that if you stare at a guy (again, without a wedding ring) for 3-5 min without looking away, they will come up to you. SO take that for what it's worth :) Let me know how it goes! cx
Thank you!
Wise words. Number 9 is EXACTLY what I find myself saying over and over again to women in the dating world (and what I wish I could go back and tell my younger self). I have been musing on writing a post on this myself 😊
This is a big one! I think when you flip that script and are deciding how you feel vs wondering how they feel everything changes. Write the post! Everyone needs to read and re-read these things over and over :)
Absolutely true and beautifully written per usual. 😍😍😍
Many thanks!! Would love to hear what you want to hear more of too... all ears :)
Thanks so much for responding. I love when you write about dating or what you wrote about living without kids. I can do relating to all of it, being in my mid 40s and juggling with ideas of a life you thought you would be living and actual life you are living. Any wisdom of perimenopause would also be useful. But truthfully it always seems that whatever you write about rings very true for me so just keep going. :))
Somehow I’ve stumbled upon your site and am receiving your emails. Not to sound rude, but I have no idea how. I don’t remember signing up. However, after reading a few emails I received and then this article, I’m hooked. You are so genuine, kind and upfront about dating beyond divorce and later in life. I’m happy to say quite a bit I know already, and still this is so validating, helpful and supportive. Thank you!
Reagan! Your message made my day / week / year. Means a lot. And always curious to know what you're interested in reading more about. Happy to be connected.
Thank you!! cx
And now you made mine! I’m so thrilled you responded. Honestly, I appreciate your writings on what’s possible in a next chapter of life. I’m 42 and divorced - amicable and it’s been a few years, so that’s not a thing - but you know, it’s like ok what am I doing now? I’d still love to meet someone amazing for me, have a baby. I have an awesome career, friends and family, and I just don’t want to lose focus that there’s still so much out there and possible. So more of that inspiration, and you’re doing that with this site. So thank you!